that girl…
“I want to revisit the very raw, very beaten, and very scared little girl that walked out of that office feeling like I had been given a death sentence.”
It is actually a magnificent view from this side of cancer… the side that fought a hard six months getting rid of stage IIIC ovarian cancer, then fought again when told I had an 80% chance of getting my cancer back. I went to my Onc-Doc for what I thought would be our last visit, but our visit didn’t end in a “good bye”; it most certainly felt like a “see ya soon,” and that sucked!
AH! -- Still shaking my head while writing this!
With a little distance between that appointment and today, about 9 months, I now find it easier (and life affirming) to focus on the amazing news my Doctor gave me after my full-hysterectomy, on New Year’s Eve no less. The first three months of chemo actually rid my body of a grapefruit size tumor with octopus legs that spread throughout my abdomen; Doc-Onc literally said there was no cancer to remove! So, my scars healed and one month later I began a 3-month run of intra-peritoneal chemo that kicked my butt, literally.
My Doctor now tells MY story to his patients… SO, I CHOOSE to focus on getting to be “that girl” he talks about, because surely, THAT GIRL, falls within the 20% that doesn’t get a repeat cancer.
So, BAM… “I got that going for me!”
At the risk of repeating myself, I want to revisit the very raw, very beaten, and very scared little girl that walked out of that office feeling like I had been given a death sentence. 24 hours of freak out, lots of tears and alone time later, I made an appointment with who I would later refer to as Yoda. I knew it was time to engage with some eastern medicine, and I turned to Yoda for healing, cleansing and strengthening. I was such a stubborn little patient, and thought myself quite strong simply because I could stand tall and walk down any frightening hallway I could find. And boy did I find a very strange, long, hallway to walk down for two months.
It all began with my mother-in-law’s recommendation to visit an eastern medicine Doc (near me) who had successfully cured many people from cancer. I was a bit nervous but I thought my only refuge from crazy-town was going to be found in Yoda’s 2-story building filled with cobwebs, plants, jars, candles, cinnamon burning cinnamon, stacks of boxes, leaning pillars & planks, peeling paint and a single piece of paper with a note to head upstairs for the healing center. The second floor had more boxes, many doors and holes in the ceiling… my mouth must’ve hit the floor when a little man with a big grin came into the hall and waved me through, “yes, yes… very messy; please come sit inside.” He had me at “yes'“… well, not really! Truth told, I went home after that meeting and cried, called a couple people to discuss my new-found friend. Went back two more times, and then finally rolled over and let him rule my world…
No chicken, no shellfish
Hot liquids/food only
Lots of rice and beans
Eat random herbs/concoctions daily… still taking the main one
Qi Gong 4 days a week, “bone marrow” qi gong – and I researched the “bone marrow” aspect, there doesn’t seem to be any written example or teaching of this particular qi gong; but experts agree if you have studied the teachings, you, of course, understand what to do.
By following Yoda’s guidelines, I slowly came back to life & after 3 months of working hard, I took the summer off to enjoy life again… by my rules!!