standard of care & intuitive flow
who am I without myself
“Going with the flow” is far easier to define than it is to accomplish when going through tough times, but it is worth trying to encompass.
Buddhist, Taoist and martial arts expert, Bruce Lee is known for explaining flow using water:
“Empty your mind. Be formless, shapeless, like water. Now you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle, it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend.”
And one of my favorite poets, Rumi, said, “when you do things from your soul, you feel a river moving in you, a joy.”
Some researchers state that, “equally critical to achieving this state (of flow) is the ability to let go of conscious control and trusting the process without attachment to the outcome. This balance between mastery and mindfulness creates optimal conditions for peak performance and immersive focus.”
This is my latest challenge, to let go of my expectations, seek refuge within myself, and allow life to flow through me. With JOY, PEACE,HOPE HEART & HEALTH… I can accomplish this with a bit of focus and determination. To allow the tears, but not to feel too sorry for myself for too long…
My tears
Flow down
More often now
Not scared
Fear can’t
Hold me long
I am simply
Not ready
To go
Who am I
Without
Myself
My tears
Plea for
More of me
Buddhism gives us guidelines to follow to help us suffer less; they are practices to help us heal ourselves; the simplest being that our thoughts of desiring for change cause sadness, frustration, anger, and stress. So step one… accept your suffering as what is, and not what will always be. Maybe because this isn’t my first cancer battle, or maybe it is my nature, but I easily surrender into healing. Focusing healing as my ‘stream of consciousness,’ I can effortlessly move my thoughts and ideas into a powerful flow within me. The issue then becomes the surrender and not to focus on the outcome, just the acceptance of the natural ebb and flow of my life – both inner and outer worlds.
When tears aren't enough to heal the pain, it often means the emotions you're experiencing run deep and are difficult to process. It’s okay to feel this way—pain and grief can take many forms, and everyone copes differently. Here are some things to consider:
1. Seek Connection: Talk to someone you trust—a friend, family member, or therapist. Sharing your feelings can make them feel less overwhelming.
2. Express in Other Ways: If tears don't bring relief, try other forms of expression, like journaling, art, music, or even physical activities like running or yoga.
3. Be Patient with Yourself: Healing takes time, and there’s no right or wrong way to grieve or process pain.
4. Find Support: You don’t have to go through it alone. Support groups or professional counseling can provide tools to navigate deep pain.
5. Practice Self-Compassion: Be gentle with yourself. It's okay to not be okay, and your pain is valid.
One of my Oncologists had the nerve to take turn to her whiteboard and explained that medicine has three avenues:
1. Standard of care
2. Clinical trials
3. Alternative medicine
It is very easy to be lulled into standard of care, but when it isn’t healing your cancer, one tends to look at alternatives. Trusting your instincts and adhering to a doctor’s standard of care are both valid approaches, but they don't have to be mutually exclusive. Striking a balance between the two can empower you to make the best decisions for your health. Here’s how to navigate this delicate line:
Trusting Your Instincts
1. You Know Your Body Best: If something feels off despite reassurance from a doctor, it’s important to advocate for yourself.
2. Seek a Second Opinion: If your instincts conflict with the advice you've received, consulting another doctor can provide clarity.
3. Stay Informed: Educate yourself about your symptoms or condition to have productive conversations with healthcare providers.
4. Communicate Clearly: Share your concerns openly with your doctor. They may adjust their approach based on your insights.
Doctor's Standard of Care
1. Expertise Matters: Doctors rely on evidence-based practices and years of training to provide care tailored to most situations.
2. Objective Testing: Medical tests and protocols can reveal conditions that may not align with subjective feelings.
3. Comprehensive View: Doctors can help connect symptoms to a broader health picture, which might not be immediately apparent.
Balancing the Two
1. Partnership: Approach your healthcare as a partnership. Trust your instincts while also respecting your doctor’s expertise.
2. Ask Questions: If a recommendation doesn’t feel right, ask for clarification or alternatives.
3. Be Proactive: If you suspect something isn’t being addressed, insist on further investigation.
4. Prioritize Open Dialogue: A good doctor will listen to your concerns and work with you to find solutions.