A PLAN BRINGS THE LIGHT

After a cancer diagnosis is determined, its as if a wave comes in and I’m tumbling around under water, desperately looking for sunlight to swim up to… it is not until I have a plan of attack that I come up for air. I think some people drown in that turbulence, it can be suffocating. An active plan of attack one can get behind brings the light, and then hope simply follows.

And this goes for any disease that is life-changing. Sometimes I can find the reasons why it was my fault, and then I pull back (hopefully sooner than later) and realize it happened TO me, not because of me.

The work I have done during my eleven year battle has made me quite strong, and just this past year, I had one of those amazing moments of love for myself. I literally started crying because I realized I will eventually lose my consciousness, knowing with great visceral clarity just how much I appreciate myself, the actual ME that I connect with every day since I was born.

Never again will I review my life in a negative light… I am where I am because I am ALIVE, and there is so much good in simply being grateful ;-)

“Where there is tragedy, there is hope for a treasure.” -Rumi